How many of you have received a compliment on your haircut or outfit and responded by denying you look good. Why are we so bad at accepting compliments? I used to be awful at this but have got better recently, maybe it’s come with age? If someone complimented me I would almost argue back why I actually looked bad, basically like I didn’t believe them.
Maybe it comes down to how we view ourselves?
Why are we bad at accepting compliments?
We think that if we accept a compliment it looks like we are showing off. If we refuse one we believe we appear humble. What it really does is come across as rude to the person who gave you the compliment, like you don’t trust that they’re being genuine. Graciously accepting a compliment is also nice for the person who gave it to us.
How many times have you been given a compliment only for you to return the compliment like ‘you look great, no you look great’. You feel like the person who gave you the compliment deserves it more than you do. By not accepting compliments we are essentially putting ourselves down. If you had to give yourself a compliment now you would probably feel awkward and embarrassed trying to come up with something. By giving ourselves compliments we would probably be more willing to accept them from others.
If we learn to accept compliments not only will it help our self esteem but we might also find out any hidden traits we may have. You wouldn’t stand there and insult a friend and yet we pick ourselves to pieces. Maybe it’s time we see ourselves how the people around us see us.
While I don’t always feel comfortable receiving compliments as I’ve got older I’ve come to appreciate them. I’m so much better at thanking someone for taking the time to give one. If I think someone looks great I will tell them. If I think they’ve done really well at something I point it out. I would like my compliments to be well received so I should be more willing to accept them.